How alone we really are...

"Turn to me and be gracious, for I am lonely and afflicted."

Psalms 25:16

Sunday we had our Discipleship for youth group. We usually get together, pray and worship, and then go through a book. We just finished a book on Evangelism and were ready to start a book called Battlecry for our Generation, but ended up going through a book with a hundred questions teenagers frequently asked. We were asked to choose a topic and read what it said then give our own thoughts.

Prior to that time, I had been in a really bad mood and I had been feeling lonely that entire day. Imagine that! I felt lonely in church! Something was seriously wrong. We each took turns with the book and topics such as work, dreams, attitude, and Gods calling, were mentioned. My turn finally came and I drug my feet. I had carried a terrible attitude all day, but I still wanted to make sure I set an example. I was the only senior there that day and I wanted to at least encourage somebody, despite what I was going through.

I took the book and began to scan the list. It seemed endless even though it did have an end. I told myself Id find the easiest one, read it, and give some "churchy" response just so I could be done. God had a different plan. He put the word "lonely" before my eyes and I ended up choosing lonliness.

It was a convicting eye opener. My emotions for that entire day were summed in that one little section on lonliness. The book hit alot on calling on friends when we are lonely and yet I didnt feel like I could, simply because of my attitude. And the crazy thing is I was SO lonely I didnt want to be around ANYONE!

After reading the section I kept my head low, ashamed. Our youth pastor asked what it was I do when Im lonely. I thought about it and said I usually try to call on a friend, write or draw, or call on God. I remember thinking about the list I just rattled off and the order I had placed it in.

I had put God at the very end when in all reality He should have been the first thing I said. Not because its the best sounding answer, or its the "churchy spiritual" thing to say, but simply because He never leaves me!

The first part of that verse hit home with me. "Turn to me..." God had been right there with me that day more than ever because I WAS lonely. I knew in my heart He was there and all I simply needed to do was call on Him.

I know I struggle with lonliness to the full extent but I can honestly say that since that day and God speaking to me about it and helping me cope. I am truly NEVER alone. Who can be lonely with a promise like that???

Joshua 1:5 "...I will never leave you nor forsake you."

Blue + Yellow = Green

-Donna